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20 reasons why you shouldn’t visit the Kalahari

27/6/2018

16 Comments

 
Leopard cub, Kalahari, Southern Africa
By Roxanne Reid
The Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park is one of South Africa’s most popular, especially with more adventurous visitors who don’t mind a bit of rough and tumble, some dust with their morning eggs. Who knows why, when there are at least 20 reasons why you shouldn’t visit the Kalahari. 

1. The sunrises and sunsets are unspectacular.
Sunset, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
Sunset, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
2. The sand dunes are orange-red and everyone knows that’s the wrong colour.
Red sand, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
3. ​The wildlife is boring; there are only so many lions, leopards and cheetahs a person can take.
Leopard, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
​4. As for the other animals, the gemsbok’s horns are too long, the bat-eared fox’s ears too big.
Gemsbok, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
5. There are too many little creatures like whistling rats, ground squirrels, mongooses and flocks of sociable weavers distracting you left and right.
Yellow mongoose, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
6. The night sky is boring with hardly any stars worth mentioning.
Milky Way, Kalahari, Southern Africa
7. The birding is lousy – nothing but martial, tawny and bateleur eagles, owls, larks, waxbills, whydahs. So boring.
Martial eagle, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
8. Why listen to the call of the Namaqua sandgrouse as they land at a waterhole when you could be back in the Big City listening to the sound of police sirens?
Namaqua sandgrouse, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
9. The Kgalagadi is all just dull grass and sand with no colour to liven it up. 
Flowers, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern AfricaPicture
10. Kalahari lions and cheetahs don’t even do anything very interesting. 
Big cats, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
11. Why pitch a tent under a tree in the Kalahari wilderness when you could sleep at home with a proper roof over your head?
Camping, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
12. Lying in bed listening to the cries of black-backed jackals or the roar of lions isn’t half as much fun as listening to the neighbour’s dog barking.
Lion, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
13. Who wants to sit at a waterhole watching cheetahs drinking, wildebeest clowning or hyenas enjoying a swim when you could be checking out traffic on the city highway?
Cheetah, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
14. ​Why would you travel miles and miles to watch a meerkat dig up beetles or millipedes for lunch when you can much more easily watch your cat eat Whiskas on the kitchen floor?
Meerkat, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
​15. The barking geckoes are too noisy. And, anyway, they sound just like the clicky-gadgets you get in Christmas crackers.
Barking gecko, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
16. Why waste time at the hides at Nossob or Mata Mata camps in the hope of seeing wildlife 24 hours a day when you could be at home on the couch watching another reality series on TV?
Mata Mata hide, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
17. The sky is huge and blue, not an interesting cloud in sight.
Clouds, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
18. Why travel all that way to experience a Kalahari storm full of thunder, lightning and rainbows when you could listen to your suburban neighbour’s teenager banging on his drums in the middle of the night?
Kalahari rainbow, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Southern Africa
19. It’s no fun to end the day with a beer in one hand as meat sizzles on the braai.
Polentswa campsite, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
20. There’s no cell phone reception except at Twee Rivieren so how would your boss be able to get hold of you?
Bitterpan, Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park, Kalahari, Southern Africa
Disclaimer: In case you hadn’t noticed, this post is a big fat joke. I’m fiercely addicted to the Kgalagadi and my only hope is that if you stay at home, there’s more chance of me getting a booking next time I want to visit!

Have I missed anything you’d put in your top 20 reasons to stay away from the Kgalagadi? Add your comments below.

Did you enjoy the article? Pin this image!
20 reasons not to visit the Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park in the Kalahari, Southern Africa #travel #safari #africa
20 reasons not to visit the Kgalagadi Transfrontier Park in the Kalahari, Southern Africa #travel #safari #africa
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Copyright © Roxanne Reid - No words or photographs on this site may be used without permission from roxannereid.co.za
16 Comments
Geralde
27/6/2018 05:18:41 pm

If I had a chance, nothing, really nothing would stop me from being in the Kalahari and the Park (which used to be called the Gemsbok Park). There are so many plus points why one should stay there as long as possible!

Reply
Roxanne
27/6/2018 05:55:26 pm

Oh how much I agree with you, Geralde. It's so hard to get a booking these days, but we have 6 days in September and are looking forward to that hugely.

Reply
Chris Swart
27/6/2018 06:14:00 pm

Me and my wife is so exited as we are leaving on tbe 15 July 18 to visit this paradise for the first time after a year planing, thankyou for the preview

Reply
Roxanne
27/6/2018 07:41:49 pm

Oh wow, how exciting. You're going to love it, I'm sure. So much beauty in the landscape as well as the wildlife. If you're camping, take winter woolies because it can get really really cold at night in winter.

Reply
Mark
28/6/2018 01:03:34 pm

We must have been at the same leopard sighting.
The Kgalagadi is my happy place

Reply
Roxanne
29/6/2018 12:08:49 pm

Ha, Mark, it was a fabulous sighting, wasn't it? And I agree about it being my happy place.

Reply
Lori link
29/6/2018 05:42:39 am

Reason #21, because it's the African bushveld and who on earth would want to visit such a wild, remote place full of wildlife?
ME! Ha.

Reply
Roxanne
29/6/2018 12:09:55 pm

Yes, indeed, Lori. What a dumb idea, lol. Wild and remote is my thing too; if there's lots of wildlife, that's a bonus.

Reply
Judith
29/6/2018 10:12:18 am

Loved the blog. Anyone who is in awe of the Kalahari will very get it.
Those that don't, do not deserve to be there!

Reply
Roxanne
29/6/2018 12:11:17 pm

Thanks, Judith. Glad you enjoyed the blog and glad you love the Kgalagadi too. It's very special, though some of my friends wonder why we go so often. Perhaps they need to be defriended!

Reply
Gigi
25/9/2018 02:10:15 pm

Yes once you have the Kalahari sand in everything and everywhere, you just must come back and we will be next Feb-March. Yeah!

For me reason 21 would be the most incredible toaster I have ever seen (in Kieliekrankie) and
22 being envious of the ground squirrels walking under their private sun-umbrellas. Sooo cute.

Reply
Roxanne Reid
25/9/2018 07:03:32 pm

I agree with you about the squirrel sunshades, Gigi. And I'll have to check out the toasters at KK next time I'm there!

Reply
Webmaster link
13/11/2019 03:36:31 pm

I had a good laugh, well done this is first class.

Regards

Reply
Roxanne
16/11/2019 07:25:52 am

Glad you enjoyed it; I certainly had fun writing it.

Reply
Lindsay Peel
4/7/2021 07:03:50 pm

Hi Roxanne, loved your blog on the Namaqua National Park. Is your book available to purchase, other than on kindle and if so where would I find it ? Best wishes

Reply
Roxanne Reid
4/7/2021 08:17:55 pm

I only have the blog posts about the Namaqua NP, there's no book. I think you must have been looking at a pin instead.

Reply

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    I'm an independent travel writer and book editor with a passion for Africa - anything from African travel, people, safari and wildlife to adventure, heritage, road-tripping and slow travel.
    My travel buddy and husband Keith is the primary photographer for this blog.
    We're happiest in the middle of nowhere, meeting the locals, trying something new, or simply watching the grass grow.
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