Why to visit Canyon Roadhouse, Fish River Canyon, Namibia

By Roxanne Reid
Fun, funky even wacky, these are words you might use to describe the Canyon Roadhouse not far from the Fish River Canyon in southern Namibia. Staid, dull and prim are definitely not. In fact, if you don’t have a sense of humour or a fondness for grinning like a basketful of baboons, don’t bother to visit; the place will be wasted on you.

​The incomparable Canyon Roadhouse pops up on the C37 about 25km to the east of the Fish River Canyon. You’ll stumble on a cavernous barn that’s the hub of all things – reception, shop, bar, and food zone.

Mastermind behind this offbeat utopia for petrolheads is The Gondwana Collection, especially brand director Manni Goldbeck, whose passion lies behind the stockpiling of the vehicles that throng the space. Not just classic cars from the mid 20th Century but also motorbikes, trucks, a tractor or two, some old identifier plaques from steam trains, and other transport bits and bobs. Think auto nostalgia meets quirky wonderland. Understated it’s not.

An artscape of rust, dust and quiver trees

The bar styles itself as a pompstasie (filling station), as well as a Boulevard of Broken Dreams. A riot of vintage metal signs hawks everything from Harley-Davidson to John Deere, Gunston to Texaco. Cheeky slogans announce, ‘Our burgers are the way they were before McDonalds stuffed em up’ and ‘Eat here, get gas’ as in the early days of American diners at fuel stops.

The bar is also festooned with hundreds of motor vehicle licence plates, some of them from as far afield as Canada and Alaska. ‘People bring them to trade for Namibian plates,’ the barman told us.

The main building lit up at night

Reception? Picture a big ol’ truck waiting to greet you. Scattered around are classic rides like a bulbous two-tone Chevvy with a dickie seat, a cherry-red Morris Minor, even a steam-powered tractor. They’re put to good use too. Some cars double as fireplaces because, you know, winter can’t kill the vibe here. One truck’s bonnet sits open to hold the Continental breakfast buffet, another wagon holds chafing dishes with the hot breakfast.

A big truck laden with lots of gear, but check those skinny tyres

Pull up a chair at one of the tables and feast your eyes on an old Shell fuel pump, a dark green Fargo, a Mercedes ambulance. Watch out for signs like ‘Parking for Italians Only’ and ‘Land Rover Parking Only’ with threats of towing or crushing. Rewind time with posters advertising brands like Trabant, Turtle Wax, Valvoline and Thunderbird.

Lots of signs on the walls. I liked: 'It's hard not to meet expenses, they're everywhere.'

​Some signs are designed to amuse: ‘Ride free – you’ll never see a [motor]bike outside a shrink’s office’ or ‘My wife said I never listen – at least that’s what I think she said’. If you finish a meal here without your neck in a kink from swivelling around to take them all in, you just haven’t soaked up the full experience.

Remember two-toned cars? Canyon Roadhouse does

​Once I’d absorbed the metaphorical smell of diesel and grease from the old cars and drifted back to the 20th century at the sight of everything that wrestles for space on the walls, I made a trip to the bathroom and came out giggling like a teenager.

Up there on the wall, among Marlene Dietrich, Mae West and Marilyn Monroe movie posters, among dated ads for Borax Extract of Soap and Coppertone, was an enormous portrait of a rather dishy dude with abs that would look good on a Men’s Health cover. We briefly made eye contact before I noticed the box nailed to the wall over his unmentionables. It had a little door with a handle, and a story warning why you shouldn’t open it. If you do – as one does of course – a siren goes off and a warning light flashes. The Roadhouse wins another bout.

A motorbike wall ornament; note the sign warning of vehicles being crushed

​Outside is a car lover’s paradise too. A robust quiver tree sprouts from the engine bay of one rusty car, a thorn tree from the boot of another. Wolseley, Mercedes and Cadillac vegetate in the arid garden, one filled with a mound of soil and an errant weed, another home to nesting mice. But somehow these rusting bodies that share space with rocks, aloes and other succulents have evolved into a zany dust-and-rust artscape. 

See the cab of a vehicle converted into a fireplace in the background

Don’t be surprised if you spot a gemsbok or two roaming the grounds looking for camelthorn-pod snacks. Remember that the lodge is part of the Gondwana Canyon Park, which is unfenced. It’s wild around here in more ways than one.

A quiver tree grows from the engine bay of a rusted vehicle

So if you ever find yourself in the neighbourhood, slow down and make a pitstop at Canyon Roadhouse. Treat yourself to some grub, drink in the funky vibes, and make memories at an oddball oasis that celebrates the good old days of motoring.

PS Those of you treating yourselves to a night at a lodge to break the monotony of camping or self-catering will be pleased to know that there’s shaded parking under solar panels and – best of all – plug-points at the parking so you can keep your camping fridge running for a hassle-free stay. You’ll also no doubt be keen to hear that there’s wifi.

A thorn tree sprouts from the boot of a vehicle in the grounds

Things to do at Canyon Roadhouse
​
1. Admire old vehicles and auto memorabilia

Another rusted car with a quiver tree

First out the gate, you’ll want to wander around and explore to find all the old cars, trucks and motorbikes – even a tractor or two – in the main building and the grounds. Enjoy the goofy signs in the reception-restaurant area. Many will bring a smile to your face.

2. Enjoy a meal or a drink

Note the old vehicles in the background that become part of the breakfast buffet

Enjoy a meal at the restaurant where tables are sprinkled among the old vehicles. You can also eat under shade umbrellas or soft lighting on the terrace outside. If you love old cars, don’t miss a visit, even if only for lunch and a tour of the collection on your way to or from the Fish River Canyon (see point 5). 

So many signs, so much fun you'll never be bored at the bar

Sit at the funky bar covered in old licence plates to enjoy a cold beer or a G&T. I loved the Namibian gin infused with devil’s claw.

​3. Drive a 4x4 trail

Euphorbias and quiver trees among the rocks in the golden hour when the sun is soft

If you have a 4x4, drive the self-guided 4x4 //Garas Trail between Canyon Roadhouse and its sister, Canyon Lodge. It’s well signposted and should take you 2.5 to 3 hours one way, depending on how often you stop to admire the view and take photos. Then it’s about a 23km drive back along the main gravel road. Expect stunning scenery with wide views of rocky koppies, quiver trees, and animals like mountain zebra and giraffe. It’s best done early morning when it’s not too hot and the golden light is perfect for photos.

A giraffe is dwarfed by a koppie

4. Go hiking at sunrise or sunset
Go on a guided sunrise hike in the Gondwana Canyon Park. A vehicle will drive you to a spot where you can watch the always impressive Namibian sunrise while you scoff coffee and rusks. Afterwards, you’ll enjoy an hour’s walk back to the lodge before the heat begins to bite.

If you prefer to be independent, choose one of the self-guided walks at Canyon Roadhouse. There’s a 1.5km walk to a sunset point on a hill behind the lodge or you can do the full circular 4.5km trail that starts and ends back at the lodge.

5. See the Fish River Canyon

Soak up the spectacular views of the Fish River Canyon

Don’t miss a drive of about 25km from Canyon Roadhouse to the main viewpoint over the Fish River Canyon, which is said to be the second biggest in the world after the Grand Canyon in Arizona, USA. Canyon Roadhouse offers a guided drive, during which you can learn about its geology and wildlife, and see a few of the most impressive viewpoints. But you can also self-drive along the C37 and D601 to the main viewpoint. This spectacular canyon is 27km wide and 160km long, with its deepest point reaching 549m. It starts in the Naukluft mountains in the north and ends in the Ai-Ais National Park in the south.

6. Cool down at the pool

A wind pump stands guard over the pool area

Enjoy a cooling dip in the Roadhouse’s pool, or just relax on a lounger to read a book. It’s a great place to unwind between activities.

7. Take a guided sunset drive

Enjoy the landscape from an open safari vehicle

We loved the sunset drive through the 100 000ha Gondwana Canyon Park with guide Aina Kanapawa Kwedhi. It’s a chance to see and learn about euphorbia plants, a wealth of quiver trees bristling with sociable weaver nests, and animals like Hartmann’s mountain zebra, springbok, giraffe, gemsbok, blackbacked jackal (the only predator here) and scrub hare. 

Hartmann's mountain zebras among the rocks

‘We had no rain last year, but a sprinkling a few weeks back has brought some grass for the zebras,’ she told us. Although they can survive a week without water if there’s green food, there’s an artificial waterhole fed by a borehole. Animals like gemsbok and springbok are particularly well-adapted to the dry conditions. 

Enjoy drinks at sunset with 360-degree views of the landscape

We relished driving through thick sand in dry riverbeds, past sandstone boulders, and desert broom with yellow flowers. A trio of kori bustards took flight ahead, mountain zebras kept an eye on us from the top of a koppie, and two giraffes stood tall against the backdrop of boulders and rock outcrops that glowed in the late afternoon sunlight.

The final stop was at a sunset spot. We enjoyed G&Ts and a flurry of sunset and quiver tree silhouette photography while the sky lit up in a riot of orange, yellow and pink.

The guided sunset nature drive leaves from Canyon Lodge, which is about 23km away from Canyon Roadhouse, so you need to get yourself there and back independently.

8. Stay for a night or three

Our room at Canyon Roadhouse with vehicle headlights repurposed as bedside lamps

​Stay over at the Canyon Roadhouse for a night or three to make the most of all the things to do here. There are 24 rooms, each decorated in tones of deep blue and grey with yellow and teal accents. 

Old tools decorate the walls outside the rooms

Appropriately, route markers form part of the décor – for instance, we had Route 37 (which leads to the Canyon) and Route 38 (which passes through Etosha, one of my favourite Namibian destinations). In keeping with the classic vehicle theme, old-fashioned car headlights served as bedside lamps. There’s plenty space for your bags, a safe, a tea/coffee station, and best of all an aircon to fight off the canyon’s temperature extremes. I also loved the rain shower.

9. Go camping

The large sites in the campsite have shade trees

If you prefer to camp, you’ll love the Canyon Roadhouse Campsite. Set on the edge of a dry riverbed, with some thorn trees for shade, it’s beautifully private because each of the 12 sites is fairly large and the campground is set behind the lodge away from the road. There are good, clean communal ablutions built from dark stone. Each site has power, a light, and a built-in braai.

Wake to watch dawn crack the sky wide open, sit around your campfire in the evening and admire the star-dusted sky. If you feel lazy, choose to have a drink and dinner at the lodge before tucking yourself into your tent for the night.

10. Do some shopping
For those who want a memento of their visit to the canyon, there’s a shop next to reception that sells anything from hats, scarves and clothing to books, jewellery, stuffed toys and toiletries. I particularly liked the room spray with nara melon and aloe.

11. Fill up with fuel

Wreck in front, fully functioning fuel pumps in the background

Not all the fuel pumps you see at Canyon Roadhouse are old and non-functional; there are fully functioning pumps out front selling both petrol and diesel so fill up while you can. In Namibia, where fuel stations can be few and far between, it’s always a good idea to keep reserves in your tank. They can also repair your tyres if needed.

12. Hike the Fish River Canyon Trail
If you’re super fit and thrive on a challenge, tackle the 86km, 4-5 day hiking trail through the Fish River Canyon – one of the most famous hikes in southern Africa. You’ll start at the main viewpoint, which is 10km from Hobas campsite, and end at Ai-Ais resort to the south. The trail is open only between May and September because of excessively high temperatures and the danger of flash floods the rest of the year. Remember there are no facilities and you must carry everything you need and find whatever water you can in semi-permanent pools and tanks (thanks to hard-working water marshalls). Take a water filter. Book for your group on the trail through Namibia Wildlife Resorts in Windhoek, tel +264 61 2857333/4, email [email protected].

Although Canyon Roadhouse doesn’t organise or book this gruelling multi-day hike, it’s a great place to stay before or after your hike for some downtime, cold beers, and a relaxing pool.

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